I got to the Closing Bell a little early after walking through the biggest monsoon in the history of the world. This place is more of a bar with a stage than an actual music venue. By day it's a lunch spot for music row suits. None the less, it started to fill up around 9 and the opening band took the stage.
The HGB, (Home Grown Band) were a 3 piece from a little hippie community called the Farm. They launched into their set and did their best to get the collared shirts and summer dresses moving with their Sublime-like songs. The drummer was really tight and he was playing a really cool snare that added a good pop to the sound. The bass player did most of the singing which was good because I'm not sure if the guitar player was awake or aware that he was playing a show or even on earth. These guys were a fun little band. Playing music they like and having fun. They finished their set and were getting ready to leave the stage when a drunk fratty started yelling for "Bad Fish", a Sublime song. Of course they obliged, and did a pretty good job.
It was fun watching the over sized band play a round of "how many people can we stuff onto this tiny stage?". After a profanity laced self intro, J-Po and the V.A.B got going. Within the first minute of the song, J-Po was up on the bar waving his hands much like he doesn't care.
This guy J-Po is a skinny white kid that is almost like a mix between Ali G and a black southern preacher. He is known for surrounding himself with fantastic musicians which is the only real reason to ever see this act. That and the fact that it was free. I'll never pay to see this joker.
After a couple of songs filled with "uh" and "what" repeats, we were treated to a cameo from an "MC" who was a lifelong Tennessee resident that thinks he grew up in the Bronx. This guy gets up on stage, rambles off a bunch of nonsense, waves HIS hands in the air and disappears just like that.
So about 20 minutes in, the people started to realize that, yes, this does suck, so they start to leave. What does J-Po do? He cusses them, talks junk about the bars next door, promises an orgy to anyone who stays inside, and launches into his slow dance number "Sex in the Morning". Then he sits down on the bar, lets his awesome band all take solos, and clicks around on his iphone. All in all it was exactly what I expected. A good funky band interrupted by a towel swinging jack-ass. You might ask "why would you go if you knew it would be bad?" Well it was free, a few of my friends are in the band, and J-Po has a tendency to have lots of girls at his shows. It was something to do. More like sitting at a bar with a loud obnoxious juke box than attending an actual concert. J-Po, what a joke.